Promise
by AzureArchxngel
Summary: [AU (kind of)] We had fallen in love, and for a while, I thought that life was perfect. Until that dream hopelessly shattered like glass when Chizuru died. (Recreation of the "Promise" I did a few years ago! I hope that this one is better...)
1. Before Everything Went Wrong

**Azure: Alright guys... Promise is back! :D I'll try my absolute hardest to update as quickly as possible. My goal is to write one chapter daily; I mean, since I'm on summer break, I've got the time. But my bottom-line goal is to publish a chapter at least once a week. I really, really need your help on this! Bombard me with complaints and "hurry up!" as motivation!**

 **Saitou: ...Finally.**

 **Azure: Wow. I didn't peg you as the impatient type.**

 **Saitou: No, I was referring to your motivation and your will to write the stories.**

 **Azure: ...Oh.**

 **Heisuke: A bit harsh, don't you think, Saitou...?**

 **Shinpachi: Naw, Azure deserves it. Still, I'm glad she's finally bucking up and doing her job!**

 **Azure: I honestly can't tell if you guys like me or are annoyed with me. Well, whatever. Right now, you guys are just a part of my imagination in how you would speak and correspond with me and each other. For all I know, this could be completely inaccurate.**

 **Chizuru: This got really deep all of a sudden...**

 **Azure: Woah, I also just noticed that my grammar could really use some work...**

 **Hijikata: Then go work on it.**

 **Azure: But I'm too lazy :(**

 **Souji: And whose fault is that?**

 **Azure: I'm not complaining about it though. I'm just pointing it out.**

 **Sano: At the rate things are going right now, I honestly wouldn't be surprised if we end up feeling more annoyed with you than liking you.**

 **Azure: Hmm... Well, I obviously have to work harder then! And people say that anime and their characters can't be a source of motivation...**

* * *

It is said that when you meet someone, if your knees shake, your heart pounds, and you can't feel your hands, that person is not the one for you. When you meet the true one, your soulmate, you'll feel no anxiousness. You'll feel calm, collected, and at peace.

That was how I felt when I first met her. Granted, I didn't know that this serene feeling was the first sign of love blooming. I always thought that it was just how I was. I was always like that: a man of little words, quiet, serious, a workaholic, and completely loyal to the Shinsengumi. Nothing more than a tool for their convenience and ambitions. And I didn't mind.

They had accepted me when I thought that all was lost. They didn't even care that I was left-handed. Instead, they praised me for my skill and decided to add me into their ranks. I had never felt more grateful to anyone or anything in my life. I finally had a place that I belonged to. A place that I could really call... home. I swore from that moment on, I would serve the Shinsengumi, and only the Shinsengumi. If they told me to follow them, I would follow them. If they told me to kill an enemy, I would do just that. Even if they told me to torture a prisoner, or slaughter a friend... I would do it.

With such a responsibility on my hands, I thought little of anything else. Personal feelings and emotions... they didn't matter. Nothing really mattered to me, except serving the Shinsengumi. If anything else really mattered, it was the way of the samurai, and my swords.

The bonds and friendships I had formed with the captains, commanders, and even the men under my division was one thing. We were on the same team, we fought for the same thing, we supported each other on the battlefield when we needed it. We were bound to tolerate each other at the very least.

But love... I found it trivial. Even if I wanted a wife, who would love someone who devoted his life to murder, war, and blood? During patrols, I was not blind to the wary glances and the terrified faces of the citizens as we patrolled the streets. I had created many rivers of blood... probably enough to turn the rain to that of warm, red showers. I have heard the screams, the howls, and the pleads of those I had cut down. What woman in their right mind would want to stick with me? No one.

That is, until I met Chizuru. She had proved me wrong.

She was a curious one; very different from many women and girls her age. When I had killed the rasetsu that had put her in danger, she did not look at me in fear, the way one normally would upon witnessing a man being impaled right in front of you. No, she didn't look at me like that.

Chizuru stared at me in wonder, as if I had enchanted her. Her chocolate brown eyes held no panic; she was genuinely mystified by me. I didn't know why. Someone had just died in front of her. Any person who was not used to death should have screamed, or started trembling. But she did neither. She just sat in her hiding place, gazing at me even after her immediate threat was gone. She was still a witness; the Shinsengumi now held her life in their palms.

I had not even known her for any more than a few minutes, but she immediately captured my interest. Who was this girl, disguised as a boy, wandering the streets of Kyoto in the dead of night? What was she doing here?

Eventually, this unusual bravery vanished once Souji and the Vice Commander appeared. After Hijikata had threatened her, she then realized that she wasn't quite safe. She dodged one bullet, but now she faced a force that was not in her power to control.

I pitied her. When we confronted her in that lone alley, she never spoke of her reasons for being here - well, she didn't really speak at all - but her eyes said everything. It all seemed to truly be an accident, a very unfortunate one at that. The gods obviously had not favored her that night, and I genuinely felt that it was a shame for her to die. We knew nothing about why she was here and what she saw, but her chances of living were awfully slim.

Fear or exhaustion had eventually gotten the better of her, as she fainted soon after being confronted by the Vice Commander. That made it easier for us to take her back to the compound. As Souji slung the girl's petite form over his shoulder, I mentally sent her my condolences as we made our way back to the Shinsengumi headquarters.

* * *

I truly thought she was going to die that night, but it seemed like the gods actually sympathized with her.

She was brought to the room after she had woken up by Inuoe, looking worried and drained. Souji and the baka trio had teased her some, but were quieted quickly by the Vice Commander, and then the discussion began.

Chizuru claimed to have saw nothing, but the plan had backfired. She couldn't even retort back to what Nagakura and Harada had told her. I was told to take her away, and almost felt bad as she begged and pleaded for her life. But I had only just met her; I didn't even know her name. I couldn't show any weakness or sympathy towards her, as I had to follow orders. After all, the Shinsengumi came first. Although I slightly regretted it, I had acted coldly and cruelly told her to prepare for the worst as she lay on the tatami, frightened of the unknown.

A meeting was held later after the Vice Commander caught her trying to escape, saying that she had reasons so important that she would risk her life to complete them.

It was at that meeting that I learned that her name was Yukimura Chizuru. She spilled everything after the shock of her being a woman had passed. She told the captains and the commanders about her father, before we learned the shocking truth that she was Koudou-san's daughter. I had decided to tell her what had happened, and at this point, we all had agreed that we couldn't really kill her.

The Vice Commander announced that she would be allowed to live and stay with the Shinsengumi under Hijikata-san's care. I actually felt a bit glad for her, and happy that she wouldn't have to die by being in the wrong place at the wrong time. Someone with a personality as pure, innocent, and brave as hers was rare.

* * *

Ever since that day, even I had began to notice that we were growing more and more close as the months flew by. I didn't even need the other captains to point out that we really stuck to each other.

For whatever reason, she always found some excuse to be with me, whether it was chores or helping with dinner before she was allowed to prepare meals on her own. She always brought me tea when I needed it, and offered her support and concern when she seemed to believe that I was overworking myself. Eventually, it got to the point where I had completely gotten used to her being nearby, trying to offer her assistance.

I had actually appreciated her company, but also felt confused and annoyed by her desire to be with me. Harada treated her well, and Heisuke clearly had feelings for her. So, why did she choose me over them? What did she see in me? After thinking about it over and over to myself, I had come to the conclusion that it was because I was the one who saved her that night. I was the first person she saw after the terrors she had experienced, and therefore, felt the need to be with me since she was the most familiar with me. Perhaps she even felt safer around me, since I did protect her that night.

With this new thought in mind, her presence became much more tolerable, and I even started to enjoy it.

I began to feel grateful for her company, and how she had managed to make herself a place in this den of warriors. I enjoyed seeing her emotions and the different sides to her. As she grew more comfortable to her surroundings and the people in it, she almost began to act like a mother. She did most of the cooking and cleaning in the compound, and it was fascinating to see her working so hard with no complaints.

She also worried and fretted for everyone's health and well being, and eventually Yamazaki decided to teach her more about medicine. Later, she was trusted as being one of the Shinsengumi's medicinal experts. I was amazed at how she became someone important in the life of the Shinsengumi, and was very happy for her when everyone began to recognize her as an official member.

It got to the point where Chizuru's company was something I wanted and desired. It felt weird if she wasn't with me on patrols, or if she was somewhere else in the compound. I had just thought that her attachment had grown on me, until it hit me randomly one evening.

I woke up with a start with the words fresh on my lips as I whispered them to no one in particular. "I love Chizuru". I don't even know how I came to that conclusion, but once I did, everything clicked. How I unconsciously sought her out, how her presence soothed me and made the atmosphere feel calm and tranquil, how her actions and attitude always surprised me.

Yes, Chizuru had indeed carved a place in my heart, my confusion now completely gone. Even with this new information, I didn't feel scared or worried. I didn't even feel like it would be a hindrance on my duties. She had become a member of the Shinsengumi, and I already was one. For some reason, I just didn't seem to see the problem. Then, I recalled a saying I had heard on my rounds.

...I had made up my mind. I rose early that morning, and rushed to find her. I had hoped that she had woken up to do her chores, like she sometimes does when she couldn't seem to sleep. Thankfully, it happened to be one of those mornings I found her in the courtyard doing laundry. The sun had just began to rise above the mountains, decorating the courtyard with pastel hues.

Noting someone's arrival, she turned to face me and I didn't even hesitate to tell her.

"I love you."

Whatever she was expecting to hear from me, that was not even close. The cloth she had held in her hands fell to the ground, but neither of us paid attention to it. The silence between actually began to frighten me a little until she began to cry. From joy or sadness, I couldn't tell which, and that was uncommon for me. Hesitantly, I reached out to her until something had collided with me.

I was stunned, unable to do anything, until I realized that it was Chizuru that had ran into me, clinging to my clothing desperately as I felt my shoulder grow wet with her tears. Having no idea what to do, I circled my right arm around her small body, as my left hand began to stroke her hair. Thankfully her crying into my shoulder muffled her sobs, as it would raise suspicion among the captains, or anyone nearby for that matter.

We stood there for a few minutes that seemed like hours before Chizuru had fallen silent, her crying gone. She looked up at me with red, puffy eyes before giving me a smile I had never seen from her. She didn't say anything herself, but her eyes were the window to her soul.

"I love you too, Saitou-san." They seemed to say, and that was enough of an answer for me.

* * *

There was no other way to explain it. Ever since Chizuru and I had officially become a thing, life just felt... better. It did not take long for everyone to notice a significant change in me, even the rank-and-file soldiers noticed something unusual about my behavior.

According to everyone, I had become kinder and softer. I spoke a bit more, and only Souji and Harada had really noticed how protective I had become of Chizuru.

They were the only ones who put two and two together to figure out our new relationship. Actually, Souji had witnessed the whole thing, and teased me mercilessly about it while Chizuru had tried to defend me. Chizuru and I were both very thankful for the fact that Harada and Souji decided to keep our relationship a secret, but told us that they wouldn't come up with an excuse to defend us if one of the other officers figured it out. That had seemed fair, so we both agreed with their terms.

But we couldn't fool everyone for that long. Now, all the men had known our secret. We were terrified of what they would think, what they would do. Chizuru and I were both surprised when we learned that everyone actually supported it, saying that they "couldn't control fate" or that I "really needed someone to warm up that black hole of a heart" (courtesy of Souji).

We were allowed to stay as a couple as long as the regular soldiers didn't know of it. We accepted their kindness immediately; we weren't about to take this chance lightly. If it was even possible, life seemed to have gotten better.

Until that hope shattered like glass when Chizuru died.

* * *

 **Azure: As I was writing about the part where Chizuru kind of seemed like a mother, I couldn't help but feel like Chizuru would be a team mom XD**

 **Chizuru: A... team mom? Really?**

 **Azure: Yes, I can totally see! Oh my gosh this is great...**

 **Shinpachi: This chapter is awfully short. Is this a prologue or something?**

 **Azure: Yeah, I guess it is. I'll explain the whole backstory behind Chizuru's death in the next chapter :)**

 **Souji: This is going to be one heck of a roller coaster.**

 **Harada: How do you know what roller coasters are?**

 **Souji: I've been playing with Azure's phone... maybe...**

 **Azure: WHAT?! YOU'VE BEEN DOING WHAT?! Oh goodness, my browser history...!**

 **Azure: *sigh* Anyway, I apologize in advance for any spelling or grammatical errors that you see, and also in case any of the characters appear OOC. My main goal for this chapter was to give a summary of how Saitou and Chizuru fell in love, and then there's going to be the whole death thing with Chizuru in the next chapter. I hope you enjoyed this chapter!**

 **Heisuke: Oh yeah! Uh... What am I suppose to say again?**

 **Hijikata: Good grief, I'll do it. Azure does not own Hakuouki or any of its characters, and I'm glad she doesn't. It would also help her a lot for everyone to at least review, whether it's advice or even constructive criticism. Your kindness is appreciated- you know what, screw this I'm out of here.**

 **Azure: HEY! That was important!**


	2. When was anything her fault?

**Hey everyone, Azure here! So as I will explain in the end-of-chapter author's note, I've been messing with the DocX thing for the first time ever. I still don't really know how it works, so there might be a few things different with the formatting than normal. Thank you!**

* * *

Azure: Hello everyone! I apologize for the delay, but my weekend of festivities is finally over!

Heisuke: What were you doing during this "weekend of festivities"?

Azure: I don't think the readers want to know everything, but I will say that balloon darts at the fair escalated quite quickly... Don't worry, I'm fine XD Kind of...

Sano: Kind of? What do you mean by "kind of"?

Azure: I don't think everyone needs to know everything about me.

Chizuru: Wait, but what hap-

Azure: Shhh. We're here for my story, not my personal life. Okay, Shinpachi, you literally only have ten words to say to the audience; you can't possibly screw up. What are they?

Shinpachi: Azure does not own Hakuouki or any of its characters.

Azure: Good, thank you. Oh! I also forgot to mention two things:

Azure: First, I started driving classes on Wednesday, and it's basically going to be like school in the aspect where it starts from eight in the morning to four in the evening. I will try to work on chapters as much as possible, but I also want to study to make sure I'm ready for whatever test I'm going to have or something.

Azure: Finally, this upcoming Sunday, I leave to fly over to my family in a different state. Considering I don't get to see them that often, my focus is mainly going to be more towards them instead of fanfiction. Plus, I really don't think they need to know that I write fanfiction XD I'll be gone for about a week, so it might be a while before you get the third chapter. So, I shall apologize in advance.

Souji: Hello~ I'm taking Azure's place as she was talking too much. Let's get to the story, shall we~? Hajime-kun, are you ready to retell the tale of how poor Chizuru-chan died?

Saitou: ...

Chizuru: Okita-san?! Are you alright?! Saitou-san, why did you hit him? Also, as Okita-san somewhat mentioned earlier, this chapter is about Saitou-san recalling how I died. Wow, it's really weird when I say it...

* * *

January, 1868. It began when Yamazaki received word that a few Choshu soldiers had somehow managed to escape from their prison, and had fled north. Luckily, they actually hadn't gotten far at all, and were still residing in Kyoto as far as the medic was aware.

Since the Choshu men were still within Kyoto, the Vice Commander gave Yamazaki the order to go on ahead and keep track of their movements, while my division was ordered to prepare for their recapture. Hijikata ordered Chizuru to join me, as she was one of the only other people that had adequate medical knowledge. He also wanted her to act as a messenger in case something should happen. It was clearly obvious that she had intended to join me from the start, and she quickly rushed to her room to gather any supplies needed.

Chizuru met up with my men and me at the compound's entrance, and began to rush to the escaped prisoners' supposed location. According to Yamazaki, they had fled to a secluded forest on the top of a hill, much like the Choshu rebels that had fled to Mount Tenno after attacking Hamaguri Gate.

By the time we had reached the entrance of the forest, the moon was at its zenith in night sky. However, the moon was waning, and it provided little to no light in the forest. It did not mean well for us, as our vision became significantly limited, even with the help of a few, small lanterns. Especially that night, it felt as if the moon was emitting eerie waves of danger and foreboding.

Despite these feelings, my men had managed to find and capture the soldiers that had escaped. The Choshu had been smart enough to split up and travel separately, but had given themselves away by the sheer look of terror on their faces when they had seen the Shinsengumi blues.

When all six of the Choshu prisoners had been found, they were bound at the wrists and brought to me.

"Very good, you all have done well," I told the soldiers of my division with a slight smile and a nod in their direction. They all gave smiles to me in return, seemingly happy that they had been praised by their once cold and emotionless captain. I suppose compliments from me were rare, but I had Chizuru to thank for allowing me to open up and express more feelings.

My smile disappeared as I began scan the surrounding area. "Yamazaki," I said. No sooner had I spoken then the man arrived in my sight wearing his shinobi outfit. "Yes, Captain Saitou?" he inquired, anticipating another job for him to carry out.

"I need you to send word to the Vice Commander; tell him that we captured the escapees, and that my division will be returning to headquarters shortly." Yamazaki only gave me a quick "very well", and turned to leave. He stopped short, however, before turning to me with questioning and calculating eyes.

"Is... Is there anything else you need me to tell the Vice Commander, Captain Saitou? You looked like you wanted to add something." Yamazaki had noticed the hasty observation I had made of the area, and then turned to face me completely, now with a look of patience.

I settled my blue eyes briefly on Chizuru before looking back at the ninja.

"...Please also inform the Vice Commander that Yukimura-kun and I will be completing one final look around the hill to make sure that we have recaptured everyone. I can't say when we will be back." With one final nod, Yamazaki gave a bow before seemingly disappearing into the shadows.

Chizuru, who had been silent and waiting patiently at my side, now gave me a quizzical glance, most likely at what I had told Yamazaki. I lowered my head to her ear, and gently whispered, "I've been feeling a demonic presence lingering in this forest. It is most likely Kazama or one of the other demons. I would like to check it out before we head back to the compound."

After hearing this, her confused expression turned to something grave and serious, and she gave me a nod. Although we had faced these demons multiple times, I could see through her brave and courageous front and saw just how timid and frightened she was. It was no surprise to me. These demons were strong, far more powerful than the average human, which had been made clear in the many encounters with them.

Upon seeing Chizuru tremble ever so slightly at my side, I gave her a warm smile and took her hand. It was small and felt fragile in mine, almost as if it could fall to pieces at the slightest touch. I gave it a gentle squeeze, and Chizuru seemed to become much more calmer. She in turn gave me a smile full of love and thanks, and at that moment, I had wanted so badly to take her in my arms and hold her tightly. But with the oni drawing closer and closer, I knew it would have to wait.

Just before I turned around to search, Chizuru did something bold and curious. She stood on the tips of her toes and pressed her lips to mine. It was taking all of my willpower to hold myself back, as I desperately craved more of her. All too soon, she pulled away while I stared at her in amazement.

"Thank you, Saitou-san, for cheering me up. I know that we have faced the oni numerous times, but their power and their... ambitions... frighten me nonetheless." She dropped her chocolate gaze to the ground with a sad smile etched upon her face. This time, I took her other hand, and began to stroke her hair in a comforting manner.

"There is no reason to feel ashamed for being frightened of them, Chizuru. You have a very good reason to be..." I trailed off, not really certain of what to say next. Chizuru didn't seem to be bothered by it in the slightest, and instead gave me a dauntless smile while her eyes seemed to shine more than usual.

"Let's go meet whoever it is, Saitou-san," she exclaimed with determination. I gave her a final smile before leading the way with her hand in mine.

While making sure I kept my instincts sharp, I began to think of how much Chizuru had changed over the years of living with the Shinsengumi. Although she had still been pretty brave for the first year or so that I knew her, it was obvious to me now how much she had grown. She had blossomed into a beautiful woman, and always stood firm in times of trouble. Perhaps her incredible acts of valor were a part of what had made me fall for her in the first place.

My thoughts were cut short when I heard the familiar crunch of footsteps on a dirt path. I froze in place, and held a protective arm out in front of Chizuru, ready to bring her behind my back if I had too.

The figure walking toward us was drowned in darkness, and I couldn't make out who it was until I saw two ruby eyes that flashed dangerously under the tiny sliver of moonlight. It was Kazama.

I instantly pulled Chizuru behind me, my own eyes hard and merciless toward the oni now standing only a few feet in front of us. There was a small gap in the foliage above us, allowing me to see only a little, but enough of Kazama's profile. His lips curled into something like a smirk and a sneer, and he crossed his arms over his chest.

"Oh...? What's a lowly Shinsengumi cur like you doing with my bride...?" Kazama snarled maliciously as I felt Chizuru's quivering hand clutch the fabric of my haori. "Well, I suppose I can thank you for saving me the trouble of having to walk to your headquarters to retrieve her myself." He added the last part in that arrogant tone of his, chin raised and eyes hungrily devouring Chizuru's image.

I didn't say anything, and instead glared angrily at the demon. Perhaps this wouldn't make a difference; perhaps it would only make things worse, but I felt the need to declare it anyway.

"I am sorry to disappoint you, Kazama, but I'm afraid that Yukimura-kun is no longer your bridal candidate," I announced with conviction. Kazama only gave me a look of suspicion and confusion.

"What do you mean?" he inquired, venom laced in his speech, probably at the outrageous idea that Chizuru could no longer be his wife.

"Chizuru, hide in the bushes," I ordered her under my breath. "This could get ugly." She seemed to hesitate for a spell before releasing her grip on my coat and running toward some nearby bushes as I had told her. With her a safe distance away, I pulled my katana out of its sheath before informing Kazama of our relationship.

"Yukimura-kun and I are already a couple, and I would appreciate it if you didn't bother us any further. You have no purpose here. Begone, demon," I declared coldly toward the man in front of me, whose eyes widen with complete rage and fury.

"How dare you! Shit, such as yourself, ordering me around?!" He howled wrathfully. Kazama pulled out his sword, and lunged at me with inhuman speed. He had already transformed into his demon appearance, hair now glinting white and a lot more visible. Small horns adorned his forehead, and crimson eyes were consumed by a golden color.

I lifted my sword and grunted as I just barely blocked his first attack, and the battle began. We exchanged blows at an incredible speed, and to some, it could almost look like we were dancing. But it was much too fast for it to be a dance, or a mere performance, and it was not just about the Aizu versus Satcho anymore. It became a battle of dominance, with Chizuru as the prize.

Kazama lashed at me for the first few minutes of the battle. His words gave me the impression of a searing desire to wound my pride, antagonize me, maybe at the very least distract me. Or, perhaps he simply felt that I deserved to be the one he vented his frustration at. After observing his movements while barely paying any attention to what he was saying, it had seemed to me that he merely wanted to vent, and that unfortunate soul happened to be me. It makes sense; I did irritate him after all.

When we had gone well into the fight, the demon then took an attitude and tone of arrogance. He mocked me and how my 'wimpy human powers could never compare to the likes of me'. I just ignored him, as allowing mere talk to wound you up was often the downfall of many. Unless you were someone like Shinpachi or Heisuke, who had a knack for getting into a scuffle because of a few mere insults and managing to come out more or less unscathed.

For a while, no one gave any signs of backing down, and we both had accumulated quite the assortment of cuts and gashes. But I was getting tired; I was neither demon nor fury, just a normal human. Kazama saw this, and if it was even possible, began to increase his speed.

I collapsed to the ground with fresh wounds, panting, with dripping blood creating a deadly pool at my knees.

"Are you ready to die, noisome trash?" Kazama asked me, and lifted his sword to prepare for the final blow. All of a sudden, his focus was on where Chizuru was hiding, and not me. At first, I was livid and began to stand up to the best of my abilities until I saw the look on his face - pure terror. Something that I might never see from Kazama again, and the fact that he looked so horrified while looking over at Chizuru's direction made my blood run cold.

"CHIZURU!" He screamed, and no sooner had her name left his lips, I heard the unmistakable crack of a gunshot.

I was completely still, and had almost forgotten how to breathe. I could feel the blood drain from my face, and turned my head around to look.

There was a hole in Chizuru's chest, right in the middle of her heart, and her eyes were as large as saucers. She crumpled to the floor, and when I looked up, I saw the silhouette of a man with rifle in his hands. Smoke was trailing from the muzzle, and it was obvious that he was the one who had shot Chizuru. Upon closer inspection, my blood began to boil with vexation; I realized that the man was from the Choshu domain. Even worse, he bore the familiar white hair and red eyes of the abominations I knew all too well.

It was a fury.

"DAMNIT TO HELL!" Kazama screeched at the top of his lungs, and pounced on the fury with his sword high in the air, before bringing it down in a fleeting arc. Red droplets of blood sprayed out and drenched the demon, as the fury sunk to the ground like Chizuru had done shortly before.

Somehow I had found the strength - most likely because of what had happened to Chizuru - to stand up and rush to Chizuru's side. I immediately held her in my arms, and desperately tried to find a pulse. It was there, but very faint, almost nonexistent. At one point I thought she was already dead until she began gasping for air, before coughing up blood.

"Chizuru!" I exclaimed as she weakly rolled her head to look at me, her gasps becoming a crescendo of intensity.

It was awful luck that the shot hadn't killed her instantly. Instead, she was forced live her final moments in excruciating pain. I cursed the fates that her demon blood couldn't heal fatal wounds like this. I even began to feel conflicted when I remembered the small, glass vial hidden within the depths of my kimono.

No. That would be selfish of me, turning her into a monster, making her extra chance at life absolutely miserable, only because I wanted her to stay with me longer.

I hadn't even realized tears were pooled in the corners of my eyes until I witnessed Chizuru lifting a shaking finger to wipe them away. Despite the fact that she was dying, she didn't looked like she was in pain, or pitying herself. The sadness in her eyes was for me; she probably felt guilty for the trouble she caused, and perhaps the problems her death would create in the future.

"Chizuru... what happened in the Shinsengumi that was your fault? When was anything your fault...?" I asked her in disbelief, barely able to keep my voice level and calm as I desperately held back my tears.

"Ha-ha-j-ji-me-" She breathed before releasing more agonizing wheezes. I held her even more tightly, unsure of what to do, until she suddenly stopped. Her hands fell limp at her side, and her eyes fluttered closed. I had been in enough battles to know what had happened.

But just because I couldn't help myself, couldn't remove that impossible hope that she merely became unconscious, I gingerly lay a hand on her cheek. It was as cold as snow.

I never said anything; I just knelt there, shaking and trembling with my eyes wide with fear and disbelief. I wanted to scream, to shout, to say something, but shock had sealed my voice somewhere in my throat. I couldn't feel anything except complete dismay, and the ever-so-obvious rage of Kazama standing to my right.

Kazama didn't even say anything before vanishing into thin air, probably to tell Amagiri or Shiranui what had happened. But I was petrified. I didn't dare move a muscle as I stared helplessly down at Chizuru's corpse. I did not feel anything for a while until a nagging voice began in my head.

Take her body back to the compound if needed, but you are the Captain of the Shinsengumi's third division. I hate to say it, but you have other priorities.

I also didn't want to admit it, but... it was true. I was a Shinsengumi captain; death is supposed to be natural to me. Only this death hurt me far worse than normal.

* * *

I gave myself a minute to control my emotions to the best of my abilities before standing up with Chizuru in my arms. I turned to start down the path back to headquarters until a figure blocked my way. It was Yamazaki.

"You were taking a while, Captain Saitou. The Vice Commander ordered me to see how things were going..." He stopped talking when he finally noticed the body in my arms, covered in blood.

"Oh god..." He mumbled, clearly not expecting this outcome of my 'demon search'. He quickly looked me over, and immediately began to fret for my health when he noticed my clothes covered in my own blood, and the many cuts that came with them.

"No, I am fine, Yamazaki," I barked at him coldly, and continued walking down the path until he gripped my shoulder to stop me.

"But, Captain Saitou, you look like you can barely stand! Here, allow me to take Yukimura-kun's-"

"Yamazaki!" I raised my voice at him, something I rarely do even under intense pressure. "You can treat my wounds when we get back to the compound, but please, just... grant me this opportunity..." The sentence came out a lot more melancholic than I had intended, but at least Yamazaki agreed to stop pestering me.

Neither of us said anything during the walk back, and we remained silent even after we had arrived back at headquarters. Heisuke rushed out to meet us at the front gate, but halted upon seeing Chizuru's broken, bloody, and lifeless body.

* * *

A meeting was called about half an hour later, once everyone found out about Chizuru. All the higher-ups, including Yamazaki and Shimada-san, were required to attend to discuss what to do with her body. It was a huge shock for everyone, almost as if they had thought that Chizuru couldn't die, whether it was because she was a pureblooded demon, or because everyone simply felt that she was protected well enough.

In the meantime, her body was placed in her room until we had figured out what to do with it. I was honestly surprised that we had a meeting about the whole ordeal; I would have assumed that we would have just buried her somewhere and get it over with, as we usually do for our comrades. But Chizuru had obviously become someone important, and since we were able to get the body back and there were no major problems to deal with, I guess the commanders felt that they had the luxury to talk about it with the captains.

Before we decided on anything, everyone wanted to know what had happened, so I told them. As I did, felt tendrils of hate burning through my body. I honestly didn't know why, there was really no logical explanation for it. Perhaps I was still upset about losing Chizuru.

Of course I was. Who wouldn't be upset after losing their lover? Wouldn't it feel like half of your soul just... disappeared? Despite how depressing everything seemed to be, I still smiled to myself.

Chizuru was the one who taught me to express my feelings more, to feel more emotion. She taught me that there were other things to live for, rather than just have my life solely revolve around my duties and obligations. In a way, she transformed me, set me free. And I was forever grateful to her.

The air quickly became dark and gloomy once I had finished telling the story, which made me want to gag. Everyone seemed to be silently mourning when Hijikata spoke up.

"Well... what do you guys think?" He asked, his sharp violet gaze scanning over everyone in the room.

"I think we should just bury her somewhere. Isn't that what we usually do? I don't even know why we're having this meeting the first place." Souji complained, crossing his arms across his chest while staring back at Hijikata.

He did have a point. As much as I appreciated everyone's sentiment and thought in the matter, why were we going so far out of our way for her...?

Everyone in the room considered Souji's opinion before Harada rose a hand. "As much as I like-liked, Chizuru, I agree with Souji. It would probably just be best to bury her somewhere. Perhaps at a temple, or a place nearby that she might like. I mean... what else would we do with her?"

The men seemed to have agreed with Harada's statement, and looked back at the Vice Commander, who looked questioningly at me.

"Well? Is this okay to you?" he asked, his voice unusually soft and quiet. I didn't have any reason to object, as Harada's statement was reasonable. What else could we do with her body? I only gave a solemn nod, as it was decided that Yamazaki, Kondou-san, Heisuke, Harada and I would find a place to bury her.

* * *

Within a secluded region of Kyoto, we found a small forest a short distance away from our headquarters. A road less traveled within this forest led to a cliff, obscured from anywhere you look except for those on the cliff itself.

We were quick to bury her before the sun began to rise, and decided to dig her grave right underneath a glorious maple tree, branches spreading far out like a spider's web. After placing a few stones at the head of the grave to mark it, and after placing an assortment of wildflowers, we had completed the burial.

Everyone at Chizuru's grave sent a prayer to her before walking down the path. When I was sure everyone was out of eyesight, I allowed myself to cry. I didn't dare sob, for fear of anyone hearing but... I just gave myself permission to relieve some of the feelings that had been bottled up inside of me. When I had finished, I hastily wiped the last of my tears, and ran to catch up with the others.

Little had I known, a pair of crimson eyes had been watching the entire thing.

* * *

Azure: I couldn't do this in the beginning author's note, since Souji was a bit impatient, so I'm going to do it here.

Azure: I would like to thank the users xMousex, ImpracticalDemon, nakigaoyuu, and Hyme-chan for reviewing! It means a whole lot to me! :D I would like to thank ImpracticalDemon especially for agreeing to be my beta-reader! You have no idea how much it'll help!

Hijikata: Are you done yet?

Azure: Well, since you volunteered, would you mind doing the end note thing...?

Hijikata: *sighs dramatically* Please rate and review in the comments because that'll really help Azure out, and thank you in advance, blah blah blah.

Azure: Well, I won't look a gift horse in the mouth. It'll be a little over a week before the next chapter, so until then, thank you so much for reading!


	3. What has become of her?

**Azure: Hi everyone! Goodness, this update took a lot longer than I wanted... But what am I to do if the stomach flu decides to ruin my life? ;;w;;**

 **Heisuke: You couldn't write this chapter any sooner because of the stomach flu?**

 **Azure: Alright Heisuke, let me tell you a thing-**

 **Hijikata: And there she goes. I'll be taking over from here. Um... who had the duty again? Ah, Shinpachi. Time for you to do the honors.**

 **Shinpachi: *rolls eyes* Why does it have to be me...? Anyway, Azure does not own Hakuouki or any of its characters, and I pray thanks to the gods every day because of it.**

 **Hijikata: Agreed... Saitou, if you could...?**

 **Saitou: Of course. Azure - as well as all of us here - would like to sincerely express our thanks to all who read and reviewed, especially ImpracticalDemon, who has been a huge help as Azure's beta-reader, and for being so patient with Azure and her... amusing? antics. If you haven't already, please read both of her stories: "The Teachings of Demons" and "Hell Hath No Fury Like An Oni Scorned".**

 **Hijikata: I think that's all we needed to cover here, unless we're missing something...**

 **Kazama: Of course you are. You're missing me and my ultimate fabulousness.**

 **Hijikata: Souji, take him away before someone catches idiot disease.**

 **Souji: Isn't it already too late for you, Hijikata-san?**

 **Hijikata: Souji, one more crack like that and I'll be adding green onions to every single one of your meals.**

 **Souji: How cruel of you, Hijikata-san...**

* * *

It was a roughly three months after Chizuru died when we received the shocking news.

Heisuke, who would routinely visit her grave, one day ran into the courtyard at full sprint. When he found the Commander and Vice-Commander, he was extremely fatigued and out of breath. I happened to be passing by with my katana in hand - I had just finished my early morning training - when I heard.

"What?! What did you say?!"

"Did I hear that correctly, Heisuke...?"

"Ye-Yeah! I... I told you... Let... Let me catch... my br-breath..." Curious, I stood in place, careful not to be noticed as Hijikata-san cursed under his breath. At first, I thought nothing of it and the seeming severity of the situation. I had only thought that something else had happened in the war.

I was about to step off the wooden porch, ready to call out until Hijikata spoke up again.

"Damnit, we can't afford to dispatch a large group of men to investigate. Shit, if only Yamazaki hadn't died..." Those words rang painfully. Yamazaki died at sea only a mere week after Chizuru's death. Apparently, he had protected Hijikata from a strike that was meant for the Vice Commander but had later died of his wound. His death was another huge blow to the Shinsengumi, as if Chizuru's death wasn't hard enough for all of us. It was like rubbing salt in a wound.

I was just about ready to call out again when Kondou-san spoke up.

"Saitou will most definitely want to lead this..."

...Wait, what?

This time, I decided to stay quiet and listen, my hand gripping the katana so forcefully that my knuckles soon became white.

"It's curious, though." This time, it was Hijikata who spoke. "Who found her grave and dug it up? The place where we buried her was not really known at all, if we aren't in fact the only ones who knew about that spot."

It was at that moment that it felt like I had forgotten how to breathe. All air from my body seemed to vanish, and it suddenly became somewhat difficult to stand still. I almost dropped my katana in surprise at the newly-found information, but it was the next thing Heisuke said that really bothered me.

"Hijikata-san! You didn't let me finish!"

"What?! There's more? Spit it out then!"

"Her body! Chizuru's body isn't even in her grave! It's completely empty!"

I actually hadn't been that surprised when I heard at first that her grave had been dug up. There had been a gradual increase in people digging up graves in an effort to find and steal riches and items that might have been buried with the deceased. But never, did I expect something like this; at least not with Chizuru.

This time, my katana actually did fall from my grasp and it clattered to the wooden floor with a loud thud. My presence was revealed as the Commander, Vice-Commander, and Heisuke looked at me with surprised and guilty expressions. They didn't even have to ask if I had heard everything. They already knew the answer, presumably because of the sheer look of anger and rage decorating my face. My eyes must have been burning with fury, as poor Heisuke almost began to tremble in fear.

"S-Sorry about that, Saitou..." The Vice Commander spoke haltingly, almost as if he didn't want to awaken a beast residing in me. I had to calm down; rage and anger would do nothing in this situation.

I took a deep breath to settle my nerves and shook my head lightly at the three men in front of me. "No, it's fine. I apologize for that, I don't know what came over me..." But I did know. The Commander, Vice Commander, and Heisuke all knew why as well but said nothing; Kondou-san was the only one to give me a slight look of pity. Seeing that, I lowered my face to the floor when a small, twisted smile formed on my lips.

 _Look how pitiful I've become now. I can't believe I've sunk so low as to have the Commander pity me..._

"Saitou." That was the Vice Commander. Hearing him call my name snapped me out of my self-loathing and forced me to look at him, waiting for his next words.

"As you heard earlier, with this blasted war, we can't afford to dispatch troops to gather information or even search. Since Shimada is one of our only messengers left, we're probably going to be relying on him a great deal. Especially now, with Chizuru being gone." I appreciated how Hijikata-san didn't try to sugarcoat anything for me. He's still treating me like the warrior I was - hopefully, am - instead of treating me like a wounded puppy. Although I appreciated the Commander's kindness, at that moment, it felt like my reliability had been compromised.

I didn't say anything and gave a simple nod to allow the Vice Commander to continue.

"Once we heard this information, we were positive that you would be the one who wanted to lead this, considering the special relationship you had with Chizuru and all that crap. But... I don't think it wise to do it alone..." Hijikata-san trailed off, pondering in silence for a little while until violet eyes met Heisuke's teal eyes.

"Heisuke. Go and find Harada. Once you have, feel free to head over to her grave and start investigating." With that final order, the Vice Commander spun around on his heels and left the courtyard, leaving only me, Heisuke, and the Commander.

Kondou-san stared at Hijikata's retreating form, wearing a melancholic smile as he turned toward Heisuke and I. "Toshi really wants to help you guys in this matter. He really does. He tried his best not to show it to anyone, but it's amazing how much Chizuru meant to him..." The Commander paused, before shaking his head, now with a look of absolute determination on his face. "You know, I'm the Commander of the Shinsengumi, not Toshi! A lot of the paperwork and duties he's taking care are meant for me! The guy needs a break!"

Heisuke clearly wasn't expecting that outburst, and jumped a little at Kondou-san's raised voice.

"Heisuke!" Kondou-san exclaimed.

"Y-Yes...? Kondou-san?"

"Once Toshi finds your group, tell Harada that he is to switch places him!" With that final declaration, the Commander sped off, probably to find the Vice Commander.

Heisuke and I stood alone in the courtyard in silence, before he turned to me with a small smile.

"Well, should we get started?" he asked. while I, in turn, gave Heisuke a smile and a 'yes' before the both of us walked to our respective rooms to prepare.

I, in turn, gave Heisuke a smile and a 'yes' before the both of us walked to our respective rooms to prepare.

* * *

We had decided not to wear the Shinsengumi haori, as it would probably attract unwanted attention. When we got permission from Kondou-san to do so, Heisuke, Harada and I left the compound. It was a little before noon when we reached Chizuru's grave.

I was appalled when we reached the site.

Dirt was everywhere, the stones that were being used as markers thrown to the side, and when I did peer into the hole, it was empty as Heisuke said it was. My blood began to boil with rage once again, but more than that, I was terrified. I had no idea where Chizuru's body was, and the thought scared me. What would a dead body be used for...? And why Chizuru's, out of all of them...?

I hadn't even noticed that I was trembling until Heisuke put a hesitant and delicate hand on my shoulder. I blinked in surprise before my head whirled around to meet the gaze of Heisuke's.

"Sorry about that, but... you didn't look very good..." No, I'm sure I didn't. I took a deep breath to collect myself before sending a 'thanks' to Heisuke.

We searched around the place for a few goods hours - with Hijikata who had joined us shortly after our arrival to replace Harada - but found nothing that would give us a lead. We were stuck, and it pissed me off.

I cursed under my breath, and slammed a fist against the trunk of a tree in frustration, in anger, that we were completely lost. Who had done it? When did this happen? Why did it happen? None of us knew any of the answers. Neither the Vice Commander nor Heisuke said anything while my anger simmered. I removed my fist from the tree trunk, and hurriedly began to walk back down the path.

"Let's go. We'll continue to search for her, but we obviously don't have any leads right now. There are more important matters to worry about." My tone was bitter. I didn't even bother to look back at them to see if they were following, but eventually, I heard the sound of footsteps and knew that the others were not far behind me.

But after that day, the matter involving Chizuru just got worse and worse.

* * *

A month flew by, then two, three, four, and we still had not a single clue as to where Chizuru's body had disappeared to. Nonetheless, we continued to search, continued to gather as much information as we could, and in the end, we were not a single step further than we had been at the beginning. Some of the captains had almost started to give up, fearing that because of this distraction, we wouldn't be able to focus on the war.

I understood where they were coming from, but it hurt, having no idea where your lover's corpse had disappeared to. I begged with all my being that the gods would give me at least a sign, a clue, as to where she was. I wanted them to grant me at least this one wish...

What I got was better than anything I could have imagined, well, at least that's what I wanted to say. We actually found her, however...

* * *

It was midnight, with the full moon high in the sky, shining among the stars. It was a night like any other, with the third division and I making our rounds in Kyoto. The streets were primarily barren and empty, as expected. It was the middle of the night; people would either be sleeping or within the red light district.

The city was quiet save for our footsteps marching through the streets. There was nothing out of the ordinary, which was usual during the night patrols, until I caught something out of the corner of my eye.

Deep within an alley to the right of me, I was just barely able to make out a blond-haired figure standing in the shadows. I immediately held out a hand to stop my men before turning to them with burning eyes.

"There is something I must take care of. I want all of you to continue the round without me. No matter what you hear, keep going, and don't look back." My order had apparently frightened my men as if they had heard an ominous prediction from a fortune teller. Nonetheless, they gave me a uniform nod before walking ahead. When I deemed it safe enough - and that the soldiers were far enough away - I turned to the lone demon standing in the alley.

"Show yourself. It's no use hiding." I barked coldly, a hand already on the hilt of my katana, ready to strike if need be. Kazama only smirked, walking out of the shadows with his head held high in the air.

"Don't go around making false accusations, human. Me? Lord of all the western demon clans, hiding? Don't make me laugh."

He now stood only a mere few feet before me, bathed in the moonlight. Golden hair now wore highlights of silver: an odd and contrasting combination. His darker clothes appeared to look much lighter than they actually were, and the katana that was already out of its scabbard shone in the moonlight like polished silver.

This man irked me, to say the least, and I wanted no more than to rush into battle with him. However, this meeting was awfully suspicious. I had to find out what he was up to.

"...Tell me, demon. It's very late for you to be prowling the streets, and it seems even more suspicious when you were previously in the alley by yourself. What are you plotting?" I confronted Kazama with calculating eyes, trying to see through anything he could be scheming. I would've thought that after Chizuru's death, he would have left us alone, as his only reason for bothering the Shinsengumi was gone. Why was he here, and what was he doing?

That was when Kazama began to cackle maniacally. At first, it was soft and more to himself, but it gradually rose to a volume where I wondered if he was purposely trying to wake up the entire neighborhood.

"Alone? Who ever said that I was... alone?" The instant those words flew from his mouth, Kazama snapped his fingers, and that's when I felt the other presence. I prepared myself for battle when I saw a concealed figure jump out from the alley to the left of the demon, and pull out a sword to attack.

My attacker was fast, lithe, and nimble: different from many of the enemies I had faced in battle. My opponent was also fairly small, but their skills in acrobatics made up for any lack of upper arm strength. The blows and strikes had little force behind them, but I was forced to twist and curve my body in ways fairly unfamiliar ways in order to save myself a cut.

As I fought, Kazama only observed from a distance with a smile on his face, eyes watching the battle intently. More specifically, he was looking at my opponent, almost... observing them, which I found peculiar.

The fighting continued, but it was quickly turning into a stalemate. At last, Kazama clapped his hands, and my opponent - who had just been clashing swords with me earlier - retreated and stood next to Kazama.

"Alright, I believe that's enough. I saw what I wanted to see, and I now have a good understanding. Thank you for playing with my newest pet, human, but I'm afraid we have to leave now." Kazama and the concealed figure began to walk away, but my curiosity was getting the better of me. I had to know.

"...Just a moment," I called out and waited patiently for the demon and the smaller figure to turn their heads back toward me. "...who is that beside you? I don't think I recognize them."

Kazama gave me a wicked smile, and his eyes looked a bit crazed in amusement, most likely at my question. "Oh...? You mean you don't recognize her?"

"Her?"

Kazama bent down to whisper something in the girl's ear. She gave a nod and removed the cloth that was wrapped around her head and the haori which was much too big for her body.

I froze and felt my eyes widen with disbelief.

The girl had long, raven hair tied in a high ponytail, and although it was a girl, she wore a men's kimono and white hakama. Bandages were wrapped around her eyes, preventing me from seeing their color, but the bullet hole in her chest and the dried blood surrounding it was more than enough information needed to figure out this girl's identity.

It was Chizuru.

* * *

 **Azure: Alright, so I believe this chapter is probably the most important out of all the chapters. It's basically the beginning of the entire story and plot line... Also, does anyone love English Peas as much as I do right now?**

 **Hijikata: Is that what you've been eating by the bag full?**

 **Azure: Yes. They're soooooo good! Here, try one!**

 **Azure: Um... I don't think you're suppose to eat the pod- wAIT NO SOUJI THERE'S NO NEED TO PULL OUT THE KATANA TO OPEN IT**

 **Azure: This was a mistake. And this was suppose to be about Hakuouki anyway... Chizuru, could you do the ending thing for me?**

 **Chizuru: Oh! Sure. If you could be so kind as to rate the chapter and review, it would mean a lot to us! Azure more specifically.**

 **Azure: SOUJI PUT THE KATANA AWAY! THIS ISN'T ABOUT OPENING THE PEA PODS ANYMORE, IS IT?!**


	4. What Happened to Her?

**Azure: Hello everyone! It will just be me and Ignescent here today, as everyone else is very pissed off at me. And rightfully so.**

 **Ignescent: As Azure's friend irl, I know what she's going through. Those dunderheads, on the other hand, really have no clue about the hardships in OUR era and can't sympathize with her.**

 **Azure: ...Who uses the term "dunderhead" nowadays?**

 **Ignescent: I do.**

 **Azure: I can see that. Anyway, everyone else should be joining us in the next chapter. They just need some time to cool off.**

 **Ignescent: I should knock some sense into them and learn them a thing or two.**

 **Azure: Please don't. And... "learn them a thing or two"?**

 **Ignescent: Y'aint.**

 **Ignescent: Y'all'dve.**

 **Azure: Why are you like this**

 **Ignescent: OH, like you don't say it.**

 **Azure: Okay... Anyway, for those who saw the update I posted, I don't need to explain anything to you. For those of you who did not see my update - I did take it down pretty quickly - the main reason for the long delay in updating is my crappy health.**

 **Ignescent: You were blessed with many things... but you lack terribly in the health department.**

 **Azure: I'm aware. I hope you enjoy this chapter nonetheless!**

 **Ignescent: Wot in tarnation**

 **Azure: That's enough internet for today.**

* * *

A few days had passed since that fateful meeting with Kazama and Chizuru. I had not seen or heard of them since, which began to make me antsy, nervous, and overall... very out of it. It was a big problem, not only because it was hindering my daily life, but more importantly, everyone else had begun to notice that something happened that night. No one had asked me about it yet, but I knew it was only a matter of time before the Vice Commander would call me over to talk about it.

I had decided not to tell anyone about my meeting with Kazama and Chizuru, who had somehow come back to life. With the Shinsengumi's already busy schedule, this was one of the last things that we needed to worry about. Besides, would anyone believe me anyway? The idea of returning from the dead itself was preposterous. I would not have believed the reappearance of Chizuru if I had not seen her, moving and breathing with my own eyes. It completely went against the laws of nature. Every living thing on earth is given a certain amount of time to live. When that time is up, you die. It is as simple as that. That day many months ago was, tragically, Chizuru's time to leave this world. The fact that she was alive again... what on earth had happened? Had she been alive this whole time? No, that could not be possible. Both Yamazaki and I had confirmed her death. Did her death cause some sort of unbalance? In the end, my questions got me nowhere, unsurprisingly. Death is not something for any living being to understand.

I was in my room polishing my sword when I began to debate if I should tell the captains and commanders about Chizuru and Kazama. I had originally been against it, as I did not wish to add more to everyone's stress, but I did plan to tell everyone when things had calmed down. But now that I had had a good chance to think about it, I began to reconsider.

Although he really had no reason to, now that he had Chizuru, Kazama still seemed to have a bone to pick with the Shinsengumi. Even without knowing if Amagiri and Shiranui were still with him, Kazama alone is a formidable foe for anyone in the Shinsengumi. The fact that he was still targeting us - for whatever reason - was worrisome and something that the Vice Commander especially should know about. Then there was the whole matter with Chizuru.

Even if she was trained in the art of self-defense, Chizuru was by no means a master at the sword and had rarely ever used it. She probably couldn't even hurt a fly. But now, Chizuru could fight. While she didn't have much power behind her blows, her technique and speed definitely made up for it. Her light and small body allowed her to deal numerous hits at a time and also allowed her to move quickly enough to attack any part of you that was open. Hell, she had had _me_ constantly on the tip of my toes, and trying not to get a scratch from her had been a challenge. I could even say that we were close to being equal now. However, my biggest concern was that it seemed like Chizuru was _with_ Kazama and accompanying him. She had followed his orders, fought for him, and left with him. It was all very confusing. When she had been alive, she had made it clear that she did not like Kazama one bit and refused to become his bride. Suddenly hanging out with him and obeying him... it didn't make any sense. Had her coming to life change something? But... now that I thought about it, something had been fishy about the situation. Chizuru had not said a word the entire time and had not made any expression and had not shown an emotion once during the encounter. Knowing Chizuru's friendly and bubbly personality, it had been very unnatural for her.

"...tou? Oi, Saitou!"

It was then I became aware that someone had been calling me to get my attention. I looked away from my sword and instead focused my attention to the entrance of my room, where a frowning Hijikata stood with his arms crossed as he glared at me. I quickly sheathed my sword, placed it beside me and dipped my head in apology.

"I sincerely apologize for my actions, Fukucho. I was lost in my thoughts."

"I can see that..." Hijikata replied, looking disgruntled before heaving a large sigh. "Listen, Saitou. I don't know what's been going on with you lately, but we're all a little... concerned..."

So I _had_ made everyone worry with my recent behavior. Not that I hadn't thought I would, but perhaps not as much as I actually had. Apparently my personal discord was more obvious than I had thought.

After staying silent for a few moments, Hijikata spoke up again. "Why don't you take a walk? You know, clear your head. Perhaps it's exhaustion... you have been working a lot lately."

Of course, that wasn't the real reason for my odd behavior, but it would be rude of me and out of place otherwise for me to refuse. After considering the Vice Commander's offer for a brief moment, I stood up while grabbing my sword and gave him a small nod of confirmation.

"Very well, I shall take a walk then."

"I understand that you're going through some tough times, but try to make it back before curfew, it's already pretty late." With those parting words, Hijikata left me to my own devices.

Strapping my sword to my waist, I exited my room and left the compound without running into anyone else.

* * *

I found myself standing on a bridge in the middle of Kyoto when I stopped to admire the setting sun. The bridge was directly over a large river and reflected the many vibrant colors of the sunset. I found it very tranquil, and before I knew it, a calming peace had come over me. Suddenly, I found myself very thankful for Hijikata's suggestion and his generosity. Perhaps a walk where I could let my thoughts roam free was just what I needed; I could focus and really think about what was on my mind without having to worry about the stresses back at the Shinsengumi compound.

As I stood there, overlooking the rippling water and the scarlet sky, my thoughts naturally drifted back to Chizuru. Perhaps she truly was being controlled... I had no idea why she would have fought me and sided with Kazama otherwise. She really did love me... she cherished me and did everything she could to make my life easier. I had no doubts about that. When it came to her feelings and affection for me, her eyes never lied. Chizuru couldn't lie even if she wanted to. She must be being controlled. But... by whom? I would suspect Kazama, but perhaps there was something more to it. Why would someone go through all this trouble to bring her back anyway? I imagined it would be a complicated and painstaking process to... do whatever they did to bring Chizuru back. For all I knew, she might not even actually be alive. She might still be dead, with someone moving and controlling her corpse. But then, why would they want to do that? What would they have to gain?

Perhaps it had something to do more with Chizuru and her position. I did not know much about Chizuru and her demon lineage. She never talked much about, and understandably so. She had not even been aware she was a demon for months after she first started living with us. But, if I recalled correctly, in the meeting the captains and commanders had with Princess Sen... didn't she say that female demons were quite rare? And also that Chizuru was more special because she was a pureblood. Apart from those facts, I didn't remember anything else, and I didn't think Chizuru did either.

...No, there was something else. Wasn't Kazama also a pureblood? That's right, Princess Sen was saying that if two purebloods... bred, so to speak, they would produce an even more powerful offspring. Kazama wanted to rebuild the demon clans and take over the world while destroying the entirety of the human race. To do this, he needed Chizuru to become his wife and give him the powerful offspring he desperately desired. Wasn't the other reason why he wanted Chizuru specifically because she was the ruler of the Eastern demon clan? With Kazama being the ruler of the Western demon clan, that would also make their child practically demon royalty, being descended from two of the four major demon clans. Maybe Kazama thought that by having the blood of the ruler of the Eastern clan and the Western clan, the lower demons would more likely to respect and follow his offspring, and this would give him more control and power over the rest of the oni.

I gave a quiet sigh and silently stared at the wooden floor of the bridge. While remembering this information gave me some theories and clues as to how - or why - Chizuru had come back, it didn't give me anything I could truly go off of. After all, I was only a human. I had had no idea that demons - excluding the rasetsu - actually existed until the Shinsengumi got involved with Kazama, Amagiri, and Shiranui.

The sun had now set under the horizon, and now that I had gotten my thinking out of the way, I decided to head back to the Shinsengumi compound. It was right then. Just as I had turned around to head back in the direction from whence I came, I heard a voice I knew all too well.

"Hajime-san."

When my eyes found her, I could feel them immediately growing wide, even though I had already recognized her voice. Chizuru was standing there, looking at me - at least from what I could tell because of the bandage that still wrapped around her eyes - giving off an air of peace. Yet, at the same time, she seemed so sad... so lonely. It broke my heart to see her that way, but I was flabbergasted more by her appearance and the fact that she was right in front of me.

Chizuru was now adorned in a pale yellow kimono, with intricate red spider lilies creeping up her sleeves and the bottom of her kimono. She wore a crimson obi with embroidery of cranes and a cream colored ribbon tied around to keep everything in place. She had beautiful zori sandals on, obviously of high quality, and still had her kodachi at her right hip. Instead of having her hair up in a ponytail like she did in the past, she now kept it down, allowing it to move freely in the wind that toyed with it.

The sudden sight of her left me tongue tied, allowing Chizuru to speak up first.

"Hajime-san, it has... been a while. I'm glad to see that you are doing well." She spoke, flashing me a small smile that made her appear more elegant and mature. It was quite different than what I was used to and it threw me off guard. Nonetheless, I gave her my own sad smile and replied.

"Indeed it has... Chizuru..." I paused, not sure of what else to say before giving a small huff of what one could consider being laughter. "This is... quite weird for me. Talking with my lover who was once dead."

It was now Chizuru's turn to laugh. It felt wonderful to hear her laugh and talk again, making a part of me soothed and comforted after the heartbreak of having Chizuru die.

"I suppose I can't blame you. This is... rather weird, isn't it? I felt myself die, thinking that I would never see you again. Yet, here we are..." She breathed, rubbing her left arm in an embarrassed manner.

There was an awkward silence between us as a small breeze blew across the bridge. For a while, we just stared at each other, unsure of what to say or do. I was about to speak up and ask about the bandage that covered her eyes, but I never got the chance as Chizuru flung herself at me and wrapped her arms around my back in a hug. I stood there motionless before doing the same with her. I squeezed her tightly, suddenly overcome with emotion, and even more so when Chizuru began to cry. I wanted to cry as well, but the tears would not come. Instead, I used my left hand to gently stroke her hair in an attempt to comfort her.

We stayed like that for a while, wrapped in each others' arms. Words cannot express how I felt in that moment; the feeling of being reunited with a lover that had died in your arms... talking with them and holding them after months of dealing with the fact that they were gone... It was unlike anything else I had ever experienced. I wished so desperately that we could stay like that forever, but that was wishful thinking. Just a few minutes later, Chizuru removed herself from the embrace with a sniffle as I gently caressed her cheek.

"I do not know why you have a bandage wrapped around your eyes, nor how you even recognized it was me standing on this bridge... but how about you take it off? It got wet from your tears." I reached out to unwrap the bandage, but she shook her head vehemently.

"I... I cannot do that. I cannot see, Hajime-san." Her voice wavered and now giving off an air of nervousness. She was... blind?

"That's fine. If you are sensitive to the light, the sun is setting, and I can give you my scarf as a quick replacem-"

"No, Hajime-san... I... I don't even have eyes anymore..."

I immediately froze after hearing those words. My hand fell from Chizuru's face, becoming limp at my side. She... didn't even have eyes anymore? It wasn't even a matter of being shy because she was blind and couldn't see anything... she didn't even have her eyes, period.

"Wh... What? H-How did that happen? A-Are you alright, Chizuru?" I asked her frantically with concern clearly etched on my face as I looked at my lover's petite form. She silently held up a hand, signaling for me to stop and calm down. When she saw that I had, she lowered her hand and spoke.

"That... is among many things that I must discuss with you. Even more importantly, I also wish to talk with Hijikata-san and Kondou-san about my... circumstances." Her voice was soft and low, leading me to think that whatever she needed to talk about was very important.

"That can be arranged. I was on my way back to the Shinsengumi headquarters. I can escort you there-"

Once again, Chizuru violently shook her head as I stood there, puzzled.

"A-Again... I have a lot to tell you - to tell everyone - and I promise I will in due time. But... Kazama is tracking me. He always knows where I am at. Presently, he thinks my mind and body are with him, completely under his control. That is not entirely correct. Only when he truly desires and wishes to control me is when he actually can. Other than that, I am my own person, like I was when I was alive. I'll explain more in-depth later, but what I am trying to say is that I cannot go to the Shinsengumi compound. Kazama will find it suspicious and will find out the truth about... him not actually controlling me." When Chizuru finished, she lowered her head in a sad and guilty manner.

Just that bit of information alone was... a lot to handle. I could feel my thoughts going crazy, asking more and more questions that could not be answered. In an effort to soothe Chizuru as well as my confused mind, I placed a delicate hand on her head and stroked it softly.

"Very well then. What do you suggest we do?" At my question, Chizuru seemed to regain some life as she lifted her hand, tapping her cheek with her index finger to show that she was thinking of a possible solution.

"Preferably, I would like to gather all the captains and commanders - Hijikata-san, Kondou-san, Sannan-san, Harada-san, Heisuke-kun, Okita-san, Nagakura-san, as well as you, Hajime-san, and tell you about everything that... happened to me and what's going on. However, I'm assuming you haven't told anyone else that you met me that night." When Chizuru paused to confirm if it was true or not, I gave her a nod to show that it was before she continued. "...I felt that it would just be... a bit... much, and perhaps not the smartest idea considering how... excited... some of them can get."

Thinking about the Baka Trio, I gave a small smile at Chizuru's comment. "You are certainly correct about that."

"What I had in mind was to gather you, Hijikata-san, and Kondou-san and perhaps meet somewhere else so I can tell them my story."

I tilted my head in confusion at that. Clearly, this was something important. I understood her desire to talk to the higher ranking officials about her circumstances first, but why was Sannan not included?

As if sensing why I was puzzled, Chizuru continued to explain. "I felt that if I called the three most high ranking officials in the Shinsengumi, it would cause some confusion and unrest among the captains and the rank-and-file soldiers. By all means, Sannan-san needs to know, but I feel that he should stay behind for this meeting to make this meeting easier to cover up. We can say that Hijikata-san and Kondou-san had to visit the Aizu clan to talk about the war."

Her intentions and reasoning were much clearer to me after she explained. I agreed with her; it certainly would cause distress to the captains and the soldiers if the Commander, the Vice Commander, and the Colonel suddenly left the compound. While everyone may not know why, it would cause many questions to arise that we wouldn't be able to answer for the time being.

I nodded my head, allowing her to continue.

"Once I informed Hijikata-san and Kondou-san, I would leave it to you three to figure out how we should handle telling Sannan-san and the captains about me. Now, before you ask, this isn't just a matter of me wanting to see you guys again-"

"Although you won't deny that it is part of the reason," I said, causing Chizuru to give me a small smile and a giggle before continuing.

"Yes, I won't deny that I've missed you all very much. But, again, that isn't the only reason." Chizuru's face grew dark, stimulating a growing curiosity from within me. "This... thing, that's going on with me shouldn't have to involve the Shinsengumi. But, unfortunately, it does. Kazama is still after the Shinsengumi, and while I may have a few ideas why, I have no certain ideas for his behavior. I plan to also talk with Sen-chan and Kimigiku-chan about this, as they're also demons. Perhaps they can shed more light on this case, and perhaps they can aid the Shinsengumi in this problem as well."

After considering Chizuru's requests for a few minutes, I gave her another nod and watched as her face light up with delight.

"I will talk with the Commander and Vice Commander about this. But my concern is that they will not believe me when I tell them that you are alive." Chizuru gave a thoughtful hum. She most likely had not considered this as a possible issue.

"...How about this?" I said after a moment. "I'll tell both of them that someone wishes to meet with us at the usual place in Shimabara? I won't tell them that it is you. It will be a surprise for them and they'll see for themselves that you are indeed alive. Besides, going to Shimabara will give you the chance to speak with Princess Sen and Lady Kimigiku, will it not?" Chizuru sent me a beaming smile at my suggestion.

"Yes, it would! I almost forgot that Kimigiku-chan works as a geisha at Shimabara. It should be safe for me to meet everyone there as well. Because of my eyes, or rather, the lack of them, I try to avoid being in public as much as possible. I can arrange things with Kimigiku-chan to make things easier for me. I can enter through the back entrance and she can be our geisha for the evening. Plus, Shimabara would be a great meeting spot to talk with everyone else, and it certainly would be large enough to accommodate everyone. And because Kimigiku will be there, I can finally talk to Sen-chan again...!" She continued to ramble on excitedly to the point where she seemed like she was going to start crying again. Once again taking her into my arms, I asked her one final question.

"Alright, I'll talk to the Commander and Vice Commander about setting up a meeting as soon as I get back to the compound, and you can meet and talk with Lady Kimigiku tonight. How about we meet at this same spot tomorrow morning to confirm our plans?" Chizuru remained silent for a brief moment before I could feel her nod against my chest. "Very well. I'll see what I can do."

Chizuru once again pulled out from my embrace, looking up at my face with a grateful and loving smile.

"Thank you so much, Hajime-san." She gave me a fleeting kiss on my right cheek - something that threw me off guard, as she had never really been that bold in the past - then turned in the opposite direction and hurriedly began walking toward the direction of the red light district.

Normally, that sort of action from her would have sent me over the moon, but instead, I grew melancholic as I gingerly touched the spot she kissed.

Her lips were cold.

* * *

By the time I entered the Shinsengumi compound, night had fallen. I would have had plenty of time to continue my walk, but now I had more pressing matters to attend to. I had to find Hijikata-san and Kondou-san and schedule a meeting for Chizuru.

On my way to the Vice Commander's room, I saw Souji headed in the opposite direction. Upon seeing me, he broke out in his usual cat-like grin before practically prancing over to me.

"Well well, if it isn't Hajime-kun~ You finished your walk already?" I was curious as to where he had heard that, but instead of asking about it, I decided to ask him about Hijikata and Kondou-san's whereabouts.

"Souji, have you seen the Commander and the Vice Commander anywhere?" At my sudden question, Souji blinked, then gave me a questioning look.

"Kondou-san and Hijikata-san? Hmm... Last time I saw the mother hen, he was in the common room with the Baka Trio - probably lecturing them about something. As for Kondou-san... I think he and Sannan-san were talking about something in Sannan-san's room."

"Thank you, Souji." I gave him a quick bow and without waiting for a reply, I hurried off to the common room to see if the Vice Commander was still there.

As luck would have it, Hijikata was there, still lecturing the three captains when I entered the room. He didn't even notice me until Heisuke locked his eyes on mine, looking relieved to have found a distraction from Hijikata.

"Oh, Saitou, what are you doing here?" Heisuke asked, a grateful smile on his lips as Hijikata, Nagakura, and Harada noticed my presence.

"Saitou! Feeling better after your walk?" Harada inquired with a wink and a merry wave in my direction. as Hijikata rounded on him with eyes of steel.

Hijikata rounded on him with eyes of steel.

"We'll continue this later," the Vice Commander snarled in a low voice. "You assholes might have escaped the pan, but you're not out of the flames yet." The snarl made him even scarier than he was when he was yelling or screaming at someone. My feelings appeared to be shared by the others, as both Heisuke and Nagakura shrank back in fear at Hijikata's warning while Harada merely scratched the back of his neck in guilt.

Waving a hand to temporarily dismiss the Baka Trio, Hijikata turned to me and folded his arms across his chest. His facial features were now softer and bore something resembling concern as he looked at me.

"Well, did that walk help at all? It better have; I don't want to see you moping around and acting all weird like how you were behaving previously." His tone seemed flat and uninterested, but I knew he truly was concerned for my wellbeing.

After giving him a quick bow, I informed him that the walk had helped me quite a lot and that I was thankful that he had granted me the time and option to take one.

"That's good to hear, I guess. If you came here just to tell me that, couldn't that have waited until after I finished up with those idiots? Was it-"

"I apologize for interrupting you, Vice Commander, but there is something important I need to discuss with you as soon as possible," I told Hijikata, causing him to frown at me oddly before giving a resigned sigh.

"Alright, alright. Come with me to my room then. We'll most likely be able to talk there without any interrupti-"

"This matter also involves the Commander. I wish to speak with him about it as well." I was interrupting him for the second time, and expected the Vice Commander to look at me with annoyance. Instead, however, he simply observed me with his sharp, violet eyes.

"Tell me..." His voice surprised me, causing a small jolt to go through my body. "...Is this about Chizuru?" When I looked down at the floor, it was the only answer Hijikata needed to know that he was correct. Well, that was it for the surprise meeting. I would just have to come up with something different. Hijikata stayed silent for a while, watching me with a keen eye before saying anything.

"...I thought so. You wouldn't be so talkative otherwise. Come with me. Let's find Kondou-san and we can talk in my room." At this point, Hijikata had his back to me and began walking down the hallway. "We should probably talk about it with Sannan-san too, it would be b-"

"Not yet, Vice Commander," I exclaimed, causing Hijikata to stop and turn to look at me with irritated eyes.

"And why the hell not? If this does involve Yukimura, Sannan-san has the right to hear about this as well."

"I will tell you why when we meet with Kondou-san. For now, I ask that you trust me on this." I gave Hijikata a determined and serious look to show him my sincerity. After the two of us had stared at each other for several moments, gazes unwavering, the Vice Commander heaved a sigh and looked at me pointedly.

"Fine. Let's just get Kondou-san. You can tell us everything then."

* * *

 **Azure: Well, there you go! Consider this chapter as a part one of... two or three.**

 **Ignescent: Just a heads up in advance, Azure is getting her wisdom teeth removed over Spring Break, so she will most likely not update for a while afterward because she's going to be high off of painkillers.**

 **Azure: That's in like, three weeks. I was going to warn them eventually. Besides, I'm not going to be "high" for a week. I'm only "high" on painkillers the very day I get my wisdom teeth removed and perhaps the day after. For the rest of Spring Break I'm just going to be suffering and putting all my food in a blender.**

 **Ignescent: Her wisdom teeth are so weird guys, you have no idea.**

 **Azure: Must you tell them this...?**


End file.
